in between the years

He woke to the sound of laughter.

Xanxus opened his eyes and tilted his head towards the sound, seeing the brat smiling warmly at him.

“Wha’s so fuckin’ funny brat?” he said through a yawn, his body still in the process of waking up.

“Mmm, nothing really,” Tsuna said, pouring Xanxus a glass of expensive wine. He set the glass down next to Xanxus, careful not to spill any of it onto the various documents and paperwork below. “Just that you looked a lot like Bester when he sunbathes.”

 Xanxus offered a small lazy grin of his own. “That so?”

Tsuna poured himself a cup of espresso, and Xanxus didn’t miss the way he took extra care to prepare it the way a certain mentor of his used to like.

“What’s on your mind, trash?” Xanxus ignored the way Tsuna stared at him, opting for stretching the muscles in his back.

Tsuna set down his drink. “... what do you mean?”

Xanxus couldn’t help but scoff. Almost ten years they had been having these talks, and the little shit never got any better at hiding his troubles. “I didn’t fucking stutter. What’s on your mind, Tsunayoshi?”

“Hah... Always straight to the point, aren’t you Xanxus?” Tsuna said with a pout. “Maybe I just wanted to sit down and drink with a member of my famiglia…” He stopped when Xanxus gave him a look. “Okay, okay, fine. I...I’ve just had a lot on my mind is all.”

Xanxus reached for his glass and took an elegant sip. “No fuckin’ shit. That’s to be expected when you’re the boss, especially for Vongola. Now stop fuckin’ pouting.” He downed the rest of his wine in one go. He motioned for Tsuna to hand him the bottle. If this is one of those talks I’m going to need all the alcohol I can get.

“Y’know,” Tsuna said as he passed the bottle to Xanxus, watching as he poured himself another glass. “I heard from some of the nurses that too much alcohol is bad for your health.”

Xanxus rolled his eyes. “So is being in the fuckin’ mafia. ‘Sides, wine clears out all the bad shit from your heart.” He gave a pointed stare to Tsuna’s drink. “Not like you should talk, considering you always have that shit with you and you never even fucking drink it. Bet the chefs bitch about all the wasted coffee all the time.”

“A-Aha… you’ve got a point there…”

“Now stop stalling, brat. What’s on your mind?”

“Oh, right!” Tsuna shifted some papers around, before he held up a file. “I did bring you here to discuss some business matters—honestly!” Tsuna said when Xanxus raised his eyebrow at him, giving him one of his ‘ don’t fucking lie’   looks.

“So you need a hit done?”

“No! Xanxus, I already told you that I didn’t want us going on hits anymore!”

“Yeah, and that worked out real well for Alejandro and Francesco, didn’t it?”

Tsuna tensed his shoulders, his eyes hardening. Xanxus knew it was a bit of a dick move to pull up the names of some of their recently deceased, especially since Tsuna was still blaming himself for the screw up, but it was necessary. If his guardians and everyone else were just going to baby him with his pipe-dream of peace, Xanxus would be there as a voice of reality.

Because in the mafia, being nice kills a man, and Sawada Tsunayoshi was the perfect prey.

“What happened in Asti was a different case. I…” Tsuna shook his head, leaning back in his chair. He refused to look at Xanxus. “Anyways, no, I need the Varia to do a clean up.”

“Where at?” Xanxus scowled when he noticed the hesitation in Tsuna’s form. Bet he took the blame for another famiglia's fuck up. Again. “Where at, Tsunayoshi?”

“Well… first there’s Alessandria—”

“The one where your fucking guardians blew a hole into the side of the fucking Cittadella,” Xanxus said bluntly, throwing a disdainful look towards some of the papers on Tsuna’s desk.

“—a-ah… yeah, that one. And,” Tsuna paused, scratching at his cheek. “The other one… is in Trieste… ”

Xanxus stared at Tsuna. Hard.

“The other one is where? ”

Tsuna shrunk in a bit on himself, reminding Xanxus of the small, timid boy he had met all those years ago. It was amazing how much had changed between the past and now.

“....it’s in Trieste.”

Xanxus felt like bursting up in flames and storming the fuck out of there to give the ruling family a piece of his fucking mind, alliances be damned. Instead, he reached for the wine bottle and took a long swig of it.

“Trieste isn’t in our jurisdiction, Tsunayoshi. You know that.”

Tsuna laughed nervously, choosing that moment to take a small sip of his espresso, which was then followed by one of his infamous “faces of despair”.

(According to that right-hand trash of his, there were currently fifty-two variations of despair, each unique in their own way.

Or some shit like that.)

“Well, now it sort of is…? Surprise?” Tsuna said with false cheer.

Xanxus gave him an incredulous look.

Tsuna sighed. “Ok, so, it’s more… like a charity help?”

“By which you mean: The controlling family there fucked up big time, so now Vongola has to go and wipe everyone’s asses. Correct?”

Tsuna took another sip of his espresso, opting not to respond.

“Always to the fucking rescue, ‘o great and powerful Vongola Tenth,” Xanxus drawled out sarcastically, trying to reign in his temper. The warmth from the sunlight helped calm him a bit.

Just a bit.

Deep down, Xanxus knew part of his frustration stemmed from how the other famiglias would take advantage of Tsuna's kindness. He may have tried to kill him a few times in the past, and sure, they had their disagreements on things here and there, but Sawada Tsunayoshi was part of his famiglia now. And any bastards that were stupid enough to try and take advantage of his family had one hell of a fucking death wish.

“Xanxus…” Tsuna held his hand out. Reluctantly, Xanxus placed his hand in Tsuna’s and waited as he felt a calming flame wash over him. Once he had finished easing away some of Xanxus’ anger, Tsuna smiled at him. “It’s okay. Besides, we really can’t have you going out and wreaking havoc on a new addition to Vongola, right?”

Xanxus scoffed, taking his hand back. “Yeah, yeah, whatever you say, trash.” He made a face when Tsuna laughed. “What’s so fuckin’ funny?”

“No, just,” Tsuna stared out the window. “I remember when I used to be so scared of you, thinking that you and the rest of the Varia would just randomly pop up out of nowhere and kill us. But now, here we are, talking as equals and not trying to break each other’s necks.”

“A lot has changed over the years, hasn’t it, trash?”

“Yeah…” Tsuna paused before he gave Xanxus a cheeky grin. “Well, not everything, like your drinking habits and cursing.”

Xanxus huffed out a small chuckle, doing nothing to stop the small smile making its way onto his face. “Like you’re any better, fucking pushover.”

And then, he kicked Tsuna on the shin.

Gently, of course.

“OW!” Tsuna yelped, nearly spilling his drink on to his desk. He turned to glare at Xanxus. “Xanxus what the f—hell?!”

“Cut the sentimental shit out already, Tsunayoshi, and tell me why you really wanted to have this meeting for.”

Tsuna huffed, nursing his injury. “We were bonding just fine a minute ago, and you just had to go and ruin the moment… spoilsport. But,” Tsuna paused for a bit, before his smile turned a bit bitter. “I guess I never really could hide things from you two… could I?”

“I won’t let you slack off and go around ruining Vongola’s name, Useless Tsuna,” Xanxus said softly. Out of courtesy, Xanxus turned his head to watch the sunset when he heard the first sniff, pretending that he wasn’t hearing one of the most powerful men in the mafia wipe at his eyes.

(Because in here, there was no Vongola Tenth or Varia boss. They were just Xanxus and Sawada Tsunayoshi, two lost people who found a family within each other.)

“You’ve… You’ve always been a bit of a softie, haven’t you?” Tsuna laughed lightly through some broken sobs.

“Hm, don’t get used to it trash.”

“Duly noted.” Tsuna closed his eyes and relaxed back into his chair. For a moment, Tsuna seemed to have aged, and Xanxus could see how the mafia had eaten away at him over the years. The brat was always so caught up in helping others, that he often ended up neglecting himself, and it was in times like these that Xanxus couldn’t help but wonder if the only time he’d ever see the Decimo at ease again was in a casket.

“Hey, Xanxus… do you remember when we first met eye to eye?”

Xanxus raised an eyebrow in confusion. “What about it?”

“I remember being so shocked when you offered to help me learn how to negotiate with the more rebellious families in the area.” Tsuna’s eyes grew distant as he remembered the past. “Heh, I even went crying about it to him because I thought it was some sort of elaborate scheme to sabotage me.”

“All the other trash came to my office that day and tried to fuckin’ cleanse my spirit.” Xanxus huffed at the memory. It wasn’t until a few weeks later that he was finally able to get them off his back and convince Tsuna’s guardians that no, he wasn’t secretly trying to kill Tsuna (or at least at that time he wasn’t), and that he just didn’t want to have all the paperwork pile up if their boss ended up fucking up the negotiations. “Was a complete pain in my ass.”

Tsuna laughed at that, his eyes still a bit damp.

“They’re way too fucking overprotective of you,” Xanxus said. “Act like you can’t handle yourself. What brought this up anyways?”

Tsuna stayed quiet for a few minutes, no doubt gathering his thoughts. Xanxus had a feeling that he wasn’t going to like what he was about to hear. “I’ve… been thinking a lot lately.”

Xanxus tried to not tense up, giving Tsuna his undivided attention. “About?”

“Everything and nothing,” Tsuna began, “But mostly about the past.”

The setting sun caught in Tsuna’s eyes, and Xanxus could see flecks of orange in them. Fuck, he had a really bad feeling about this. Wherever this conversation was headed, the brat wouldn’t end up backing down.

“I used to be a nobody. I was pathetic, selfish, and truthfully, I didn’t care about much for anyone besides my mom and me. Hell, sometimes all I even cared about was just myself.”

“Tsunayoshi,” Xanxus said, feeling a bit uneasy. “I’ve told you this before, but I will beat some fucking self-confidence into you if you keep this shit up.”

Tsuna shook his head, smiling a bit. “Don’t worry, this isn’t for me to mope about how I used to be. Even I can tell that I’ve changed a bit since then. Just… Xanxus, y’know how important everyone is to me, right?”

“No shit, brat,” Xanxus said. “I don’t think I have enough euro to count how many fucking times we’ve had to pull your ass out of the grave, all because you wanted to be somebody’s fuckin’ hero.”

Tsuna laughed. “Yeah, I guess I forget about my own life from time to time. But, I don’t think I would change that about myself. Everyone… I’m grateful that I got to know everyone.”

Well, fuck if that wasn’t foreboding for something worse to come.

“Sawada Tsunayoshi,” Xanxus tried to keep the bite out of his voice, his nerves starting to get the better of him. “Get to the point. What is this all really about?”

Tsuna looked him dead in the eyes. “I’m going to leave somewhere soon.”

Xanxus tried to quash the panic and cold fear he suddenly felt.

Tsuna continued. “While I’m gone, please watch over everyone.”

“... how long?”

Tsuna blinked, tilting his head a bit. “Hm?”

Xanxus tried to swallow, his throat suddenly feeling bone-dry and damn it to fucking hell , he didn’t have enough alcohol for this shit. “How fucking long are you going to be away?”

Tsuna just smiled up at him.

In a flash, Xanxus stood up and grabbed a handful of Tsuna’s shirt, pulling the other close.

“How. Fucking. Long.”

Tsuna  looked behind him, eyes flashing orange for a brief moment before he froze in fear. “X-X-Xanxus... Something, something’s there...“

In a heartbeat, Xanxus dropped Tsuna and whipped out his gun, aiming to the intruder. He fired, not flinching in the slightest when a crater formed in the wall.

(He had been doing this shit for too many years to know better than to hesitate.

Tsuna, on the other hand, was still getting the hang of it.)

He heard Tsuna lift himself up off the floor from where he had dropped him. “I-I-Is it gone? Please tell me it’s gone.”

Xanxus stayed on high alert as he waited for the smoke to clear. “We’ll just have to fuckin’ wait and see now, won’t we?”

The two waited with bated breath as the smoke finally cleared, revealing the intruder to be—

— a tiny bat.

Xanxus made a face. “What the fuck?”

Tsuna yelped when the tiny thing began to chirp, flying towards them.

“K-Keep it away from me!”

“Brat, don’t tell me you’re afraid of a fucking bat?”

Tsuna moved away from his desk as the bat landed on it, the animal chirping away happily.

“I-I-It’s not my fault! They like to drink blood and they have long fingers and JUST EVERYTHING’S WEIRD ABOUT THEM, OKAY?!”

Xanxus scowled, putting away his gun. “Can’t believe that out of all the people in this damn world, I fucking lost to you… ” He walked towards the bat, lifting it into his palm. It chirped in response. “How the hell did you even get in…?”

“Little animal.”

Tsuna jumped while Xanxus merely turned to see Hibari standing at the doorway, the damn guardian looking almost pleased with himself. He scowled. Something… was off, and it was starting to irritate the shit out of him.

“A-Ah, Kyouya-san, I didn’t hear you enter.” Tsuna adjusted his suit, looking somewhat embarrassed at his current state. “U-Um, did you need something?”

Hibari huffed out what sounded like a laugh. “Meeting in five.” And with that, he turned on his heel and walked out the door.

(Sometimes, Xanxus had no clue as to whose guardians were more obnoxious, his or Tsuna’s.)

“Aha…” Tsuna turned to Xanxus and scratched his head. “Um, looks like we’ll have to continue this talk another time, Xanxus. Thanks for stopping by.”

Tsuna moved to walk out, but stopped when Xanxus called him.

“Sawada Tsunayoshi,” he bit out, “Next time, I’ll get whatever the fuck it is you’re hiding from me out.” Xanxus didn’t know what it was, but something was terribly off, and he tried his best not to ignite his flames in frustration, lest the poor bat burn up in flames.

Tsuna stared at him for a good minute, before he smiled softly. “Yeah,” he said quietly, turning his back to Xanxus, “I’ll make sure to tell you next time.”

Xanxus watched as Tsuna walked away. When the other was out of sight, he sighed, trying to ease his nerves. “Maybe I’m just being fuckin’  paranoid,” he muttered to himself. He lifted his palm. “Now, let’s set yo—”

The bat was gone.

In disbelief, Xanxus closed his fist, searching with his flame. He felt the faintest traces of a mist flame, and that’s when realization hit him like a train.

Tsuna’s cloud guardian had mist flames.

“Fuck.”

No one had the chance to grieve.

The information was delivered, short and brief, through a private line to those closest to the Vongola Decimo.

“The boss... has been taken out. We will stop the operation until further notice.”

And, maybe that’s why he hadn’t fallen apart in fit of blind rage yet—because the fact that Sawada Tsunayoshi, the once cowardly yet kind brat who wanted to lead them, the fucking mafia, out of the dark, was gone.

He was gone.

There was a small funeral held for him, closed casket and all. Not many showed up, which was to be expected because of course, in his time of need, no one was going to be there for Tsuna.

After all, loyalty in the mafia could be a very fickle and ugly thing.

Xanxus cursed, staring at all the paperwork on his desk. The brat’s damned guardians were leaving traces behind all over the fucking place, and he had to pull some strings to get their trails removed.

Leave it to a bunch of grieving bastards to try and run the Vongola to the ground.

“While I’m gone, please watch over everyone.”

He leaned back in his chair and closed his eyes. There were no tears, just the taste of bitterness and defeat. His heart felt raw and numb. Tsuna was gone. Someone who held the famiglia together after Reborn died, who helped them cut down their losses and told them to never lose faith—

—and now he was gone. Just like that.

Xanxus stared at the sunset through the windows. “You knew this was going to happen, didn’t you, Tsunayoshi?“ he asked to no one in particular. “You fucking knew.” Xanxus laughed a little, a tightness in his chest.

In a way, he found it kind of funny, ironic even. Years ago, he would have stopped at nothing to put Tsuna in a grave, waiting for the perfect opportunity to steal the position of Tenth from him. And now, here he was, grieving for that same person who had slowly wormed his way into his heart over the years.

Life really was a bitch.

A knock brought Xanxus out of his thoughts.

“Enter,” he answered.

A member from one of the lower ranks, an informant most likely, entered. For the life of him, Xanxus couldn’t remember his name. If Tsuna was here, he probably would have scolded Xanxus and preach about how he ‘should remember his companions names’ or some sort of nice shit like that.

The informant paused, staring at Xanxus with a mix of fear and amazement.

Xanxus glared at him, taking joy in how the other flinched. “What?”

“U-Uh, n-n-nothing,” the man stammered out, trying to keep a steady gaze with Xanxus. “Just… You seemed to be in a good mood—a-a-ah!” He scrambled to continue when he noticed the dark look in Xanxus eyes. “I came here to report on s-some new intel from the main branch regarding Millefiore’s movements.”

Xanxus held his hand out, and the man rushed to hand over the documents. After flipping through them briefly, Xanxus set the papers down. “You’re dismissed, trash.”

“T-Thank you, Boss.”

There was a noise and Xanxus frowned. He heard a set of heavy footsteps headed his way. The only one dumb enough to do that was the fucking shark.

Just as the informant was about to head out, the door slammed open, knocking the poor man out.

“VOI, SHITTY BOSS!”

Xanxus just stared at him, contemplating if he should throw his last wine bottle at the shark’s head for being fucking obnoxious as usual.

“Don’t give me that fucking look!” Squalo said to him. “Now get off your fucking ass, we have somewhere to go.”

Fuck it. Xanxus threw the bottle. Wine was always something he could get more of. His hearing on the other hand? Not so much.

“DON’T FUCKING THROW STUFF YOU SHITTY BOSS!”

“Get to the point trash, what the fuck do you want?”

Squalo grumbled as he combed out shards of glass from his hair.

(Tsuna would have no doubt scolded him for that, too. He always did like to admire the shark’s hair.)

“They’re back.”

Xanxus scowled. “Who’s back?”

Squalo was almost tempted to roll his eyes. “The mini trash and his guardians.”

Xanxus felt everything come to a stand still. “... what?”

“They came back from that past,” Squalo said as he shook out the remaining shards in his hair. “The main branch sent us a message a while ago and—OI! I WASN’T—”

Xanxus didn’t hear the rest of Squalo’s words, having already walked out of the room.

He was here. Sawada Tsunayoshi was here.

As he exited the mansion, Xanxus felt a surge of hope fill his chest. If the past was here, then that meant there was a chance to change everything.

He felt the corner of his lips tug into a smile as he called for a driver. “Sawada Tsunayoshi,” Xanxus said to himself, “Once I get to you, I’m going to kick your fucking ass and teach you better than to abandon your family.”

Because Xanxus would change his fate, and absolutely nothing was going to stop him.

Nothing.